Boston

Yes, I know that you thought we were all here in Hawaii, enjoying the wonderful weather, but Seth is actually in Boston, Massachusetts. Sometimes I look back at our lives and wonder-how did I get here? But looking back it is all very clear. Boston is one of those places that we have been directed to, for quite some time. Over a year ago Seth came upon an article that referred him to a doctor in Boston. He contacted this doctor and they began corresponding via phone. Then, in the last 6 months, there was a drug trial that we became interested in being apart of. It was over seas and we had a very hard time communicating with the doctors there. Finally, we received the information that the trial had been closed to international patients. We were sad, but then my dad referred us to a doctor in Boston who would be starting the very same drug trial. This doctor was the same doctor Seth has made contact with before. Crazy, but not really. The crazy part is that we had to research all around the world to land back in Boston where we had started. Seth contacted the doctor again, and she said yes she was hoping to open this same drug trial that we were interested in. He ask how he could best put himself in line to be apart of it. She recommended that he come to Boston to become her patient. So we booked a flight. He left last Saturday and will be there until Friday. Today he met with her. When he called me I could tell things had gone well. He said he was very impressed with her. Not that she has any new answers, although she is going after them as well, but that she is willing to make a plan of action for Seth. She felt positive about his slow progression and felt like there would be some things to help him, including helping him become a part of this trial. He worked closely with her team and I could tell he felt encouraged. This is huge for Seth, since he hasn't put much faith in medicine lately, mostly since they haven't had anything to offer him. His appointments have always been discouraging because they just tell him to come back when he's worse. We have so badly wanted to just have a plan, something to take action on. So yes, Hawaii to Boston is a long way, but we both knew he should go for it. That is the abbreviated public version for right now. We are both grateful for him to be there. He had a friend in Boston from his Babson MBA class that had offered before to help Seth in any way he need, so Seth called him. He offered Seth his home, his car, rides to his appointments, etc. Seth is in good hands while we are apart. Thanks Dave.

So after Seth called me today, I totally melted down. Here he was giving me good news. But I think I had been anticipating this appointment for him, and I was wishing I was with him, and I just needed to release the many emotions I had. I hadn't slept very well last night in anticipation for his appointment, and because I knew he was anxious as well, so I was sleep deprived, which doesn't help my emotional status. I put myself down for a power nap when Jones went down, and I woke up feeling better. Even tonight I feel better. A part of it is hope. Hope is a tricky thing when it come to this. We have put hope in other things concerning the project, and it is very hard when it turns out to be false hope. So as much I as I would love to put all my hope into this or that, I protect my heart, and hold off. With that said, I do have complete hope in one thing, and that is the plan of our Heavenly Father. This hope does not wavier. I have the knowledge of eternal families, and I hold onto that. Seth and I have both been comforted and feel strongly that everything is going to be okay. Everything is going to be taken care of. We don't know what that means for us right here and right now, but we do know our family will be taken care of. So while I may be shy to put my hope into a drug trial, I know that I have had the hand of God in my life. I am not sure there are many who can see the direct hand of God in their lives so clearly, as I can see it in mine. I feel blessed for that. It gives me strength and it gives me HOPE.

Love you all and thanks for letting me be so personal.